OR: They Can't Help Being That Way, Can They?
The current political hysteria over the menace of Lefty marriages in the U.S. and the threat it poses to our Righty society has now reached the point where many church and social leaders want to pass a Constitutional Amendment banning Lefties from marrying. The language of the amendment: "We hereby define marriage as a union between two right handed people." fits scriptural reasoning in the old testament because we read in Exodus when God speaks to Moses at the burning bush, "Go and tell Pharoah, let my people go! Oh, and BTW: You're not left handed, are you?" Now, I have an admission for you, my brother is left handed!!!
Throughout history left handed people have born the mark of second-class citizenship and often during the middle ages, along with the Jewish people were burned at the stake in Europe when towns had famines or plagues. Left handed people were mostly considered unscroupulous and traitors. The phrase "the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing" probably spawned from this natural suspicion. When my brother came out of his box at the age of 5 we were all shocked that one of those left handed perverts was in our family but somehow we overcame prejudice and 1000's of years of culture to embrace what he truly is: A man who writes left handed.
Genetic surveys done would indicate left handed people comprise between 2 and 15% of the population. That would mean between 5 and 30 million Americans are born this way. The numbers are probably skewed by the fact that if asked point blank: "Are you a pervert left handed person?" many lefties will answer no because of the shame attached.
Studies done where one twin was left handed showed that more often than the general right-handed population if one twin was left handed, so was the other. Other genetic studies also indicate a genetic link in left handed people. Nevertheless, the true genetic link has not yet been found and may not be for many years but I know it has always been my mother's fondest hope that the research will go on and eventually we will let the light in on the truth.
Now I know my righty friends out there are saying, "you're not left handed, why do you care?" Well, friends, if lefties are banned from marriage, couldn't the court by implied law (which is what courts often follow) say that this clearly establishes a barrier against lefties in our society? I am not saying they would be rounded up but clearly this fear that they are invading our moral center and ruining our values, peddling drugs to our children, using unholy sexual positions that we righties would never use is pervasive. Some people in communities in the midwest put signs in their lawns exclaiming "No LEFTIES allowed in town after dark!"
Some have even tried to reform my brother. My mother tried for years to get him to write and shake hands right handed so that no one would know. "Marry a right handed person she told him in his teens and stay away from other lefties" she'd implore him. But alas it wasn't to be. He hid his "leftness" and worked 40 years for the phone company, paid taxes and raised 2 left handed children who thought they wouldn't, because of gradual acceptence in society, face the stigma of how they were born.
We are Americans, right thinking and mostly right handed. We should never disenfranchise anyone from what it is to be American. We have laws, good laws against public conduct of a sexual nature and we need to enforce them but what someone is in their heart and does in their bedroom with another consenting adult is between them and God and I say, so be it.
This proposed amendment is wrong.
What do you think, righties?